This wasn’t a special day. Nothing grand was happening. It was a Tuesday, Ryan’s day off. He was working in the garage with Eisley’s new record playing in the background. Audrey was playing with chalk and Star Wars figures. It became one of our favorite days.
I do best with limited expectations, especially in my art. I think that’s why I love expired film. I understand going into it that it might not work, the grain will be rough, the color might off. I never use it when the stakes are high or the risk is too great, but days like this, I feel like it allows me the space to flourish. No one to disappoint or fear of failure. Just the ability to let my mind loose and my heart take hold.
I’m a mother, so I’m used to the constant feeling that anything can happen. The child I was given challenges me every second that she’s awake, but I soak up every bit of her spirit when she allows me to pull my camera out. Usually she stays away from the lens, gets timid and runs the other way. I hear lots of “No, mommy!”s. But this day, this was a great day. She let me absorb her energy and observe her creativity. We laughed and sang songs and drew rainbows all over the sidewalk. This is a day I am forever thankful for.
These images will keep my cup filled up until she lets me into her special bubble again.
(Shot on a Canon A-1 & Minolta Autocord using expired Kodak Gold 200 35mm & Kodak Ektar 100 120 films.)